“Sometimes walking away is the only way to stop walking away from yourself.” ~Unknown I was between sessions. My TV was on in the background—something I’d half-started watching called The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives on Hulu—as I walked into the kitchen to make myself some lunch. It’s […]

“Knowledge is not skill. Knowledge plus ten thousand times is skill.” ~Shinichi Suzuki I knew exactly what to say to my narcissistic mother. I just could never say it. For twenty years I studied every technique in the book. Gray rocking (becoming emotionally neutral and unreactive). Broken […]

“A proper grown-up communicates clearly and assertively.” This is something I have heard many people say. By that definition, I wouldn’t have been classed as a proper grown-up for most of my life. There was a time when I couldn’t even ask someone for a glass of water. I know that might […]

“When something isn’t right for you, it has a way of letting you know. Not in one big announcement, but in a thousand small nudges.” ~Martha Beck I was sitting at the kitchen table with my coffee one morning when a thought slipped in that I hadn’t let myself think before: This can’t be […]

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.” ~Viktor E. Frankl A few months ago, I was on a crowded highway with my wife and son. Traffic was barely moving. Vehicles were inching forward, one small gap at a time, with the usual impatience […]

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” ~C.G. Jung For twelve years, I believed I was the architect of a perfect life. I had the “Summa Cum Laude” degree, a respected career in human services, a devoted husband, and two healthy […]

“The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh Five years ago, my son missed a basketball tryout. We had been out of town, and by the time we got back, the rosters were already set. I made a few calls anyway, hoping someone might give a kid a late shot. One […]

“A big part of financial freedom is having your heart and mind free from worry about the what-ifs of life.” ~Suze Orman During my upbringing, my parents often fought about money since we didn’t have much of it. My mom was more of an occasional spender, while my father would go as far as […]

“Being a people-pleaser may be more than a personality trait; it could be a response to serious trauma.” ~Alex Bachert Growing up in a home, school, and church that placed a lot of value on good behavior, self-discipline, and corporal punishment, I was a model child. There could have been an […]

“Anxiety isn’t you. It’s something moving through you. It can leave out of the same door it came in.” ~James Clear Years ago, I had a panic attack while driving across a bridge, and I thought I might die that day. Suddenly my heart started pounding. My breath became shallow and tight. My […]